Bachelor Meets Cougar

| April 11, 2016 | 1 Comment


TV3’s The Bachelor.  I admit it – I’m guilty of watching this drivel and worse enjoy it!  It may seem quite odd to you that in one post I am talking about feminism and the next commenting on The Bachelor.   I had to think, what is it that makes me want to watch this?  If it is so wrong, what is going on that makes me suspend my feminist values for the hour and devour up every minute?

  1. The Unreality.  The Bachelor doesn’t say a bad word about any of the ladies.  Not even a raised eyebrow of disapproval.  Well not on screen, but he must have some instant “no’s” for some of the women.  Surely it would be easier to send several home in one go?  Throughout he appears interested and seems to suspend all judgement for each and every one of the contenders.  Yes, I’m using the word contenders, because the word sounds less denigrating than the word contestants.   Jordan Mauger offers up a sense of wide approval, even if manufactured for our TV screen. To watch a man handle himself this way is highly appealing and a tad addictive – even though highly unrealistic.
  1. The one on one dates. Where will they go next?  Will he get his gear off?  Will she keep her gear on?  I don’t care who he takes but I do want to see great activities, fun, inventive ways to date that are beyond the norm, so we can but dream.
  1. Returning to face the girls after the one on one date. The kiss and tell part of the show.  Why tell?  Just make something up for the cameras the audience knows is untrue.  It’s an odd bit of human nature to want to tell all about a great date but to do so when you know your “friends” are going to balk is fascinating to watch.
  1. The Rose Ceremony. You can feel the anxiety of the women through your TV screen.  Or maybe their squirming is about trying to stand still in those pinching strappy shoes without looking like you need to go to the loo?  A cliff hanger every time as we work out which lady to lobby for as we armchair match-make.   Is it the suspense?
  1. The Guy. Maybe it’s all about the marketing of the actual Bachelor.   TV3 Research haven’t done too bad in finding Jordan.  If you read the TV3 bio on Jordan Mauger and you know me, then I think you’ll agree I would be his perfect match.  I sing, play the guitar, appreciate great cars, have a dog, cook, I’m well traveled and wouldn’t tower over him when in my heels. Not to worry about the 10 or so years age gap in his favour.  Why didn’t the producers think to throw in a Cougar?
  1. The Real World. Imagine if dating in the real world was this vetted, researched and organised? How I would love someone to take over that part of my life.  Quite frankly in NZ and particularly Auckland, with single women out numbering men, we ARE competing – admittedly without the competition sitting right there, known to us, in the same room with a TV camera shoved in your face.  As a 40’s something singleton, the dating jungle out there seems more difficult than suffering rejection at a rose ceremony.

As Emma Watson (HeforShe) said, being a feminist doesn’t mean we have to be perfect.  So I’ll watch my guilty pleasure and ask you all to update me as to who he picks at the end because as it turns out I’ll be travelling and won’t be around for the finale!


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  1. Louisa says:

    Enjoyed your commentary. It gave a good insight into why seemingly intelligent women would want to be a part of this, and why they’d watch it! 🙂

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